Have You Been Avoiding a Specific Conversation with Your Senior?
Elder Care Merced CA – Have You Been Avoiding a Specific Conversation with Your Senior?
Some topics are really tough to discuss with your aging adult. Either the topic itself, like driving when it’s not safe for her to do so, or the idea of discussing something your elder doesn’t want to talk about can make the situation worse. Having a plan can help.
Remind Her You’re There for Her
You might think that just jumping into the topic at hand is best, but you might want to start out by reminding your elder that you’re her advocate and you’re fighting for her. You might say something along the lines of, “You know that I want the very best for you, right?” or “Your safety is the most important thing to me.” These types of statements help your elderly family member to frame what you say next within that context.
Explain How You’re Feeling and What You’re Seeing
Often, the conversation you’re avoiding has to do with something your senior is doing that is unsafe or that she should be doing that she doesn’t want to do. Turn the table a little bit by focusing on what you’re seeing and feeling rather than talking about what she’s doing. This can help her to see things from your point of view.
Listen to Her Concerns
Once you’ve had a bit of a say, it’s time to really listen to your elderly family member’s responses. She may be extremely anxious about the topic you’re discussing and that’s likely to be the emotion that she expresses first. She might also be frustrated about this conversation, which could make her respond from a place of anger or fear. Pay attention to what she’s telling you and see if you can get to the root issue behind her initial response.
Formulate a Plan for Emergency Situations
No matter what it is that you’re discussing, make sure that you close the conversation with a plan for any emergencies that could result from this topic. For instance, if your elderly family member has been having issues with driving but doesn’t want to quit driving, make sure that she’s got a backup plan, such as calling a family member or an elder care provider to get where she needs to go. If you don’t set up a contingency plan, she might be tempted to stick with her own driving.
No matter how difficult you think that a conversation with your elderly family member is going to be, you’re going to feel ever so much better once you’ve addressed the issue. Even if you need to try a couple of times, it’s worth making sure that you’ve given every attempt possible.